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Welcome to CYB| Chea-Yee's Blog.

This blog captures the musings and anecdotes of the daily life of a Malaysian who is now living in Melbourne, Australia.

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Dinner at KLCC.

30/01/2005

Dinner at KLCC.

Haven't really written much in the past one week.

I not only have my CMS exam at 2pm on the 4th, I also have a Play essay due the same day!! Thankfully, my marks are accumulative, so my marks in my Play1 essay will contribute towards my Play2 essay I scored 40/50 for Play1, so it's just a matter of making sure I at least pass my Play2 essay. I don't want to score low for it, but neither am I aiming for low marks, but now I'm just wondering how I'll be able to allocate enough time to study for both the exam and complete the entire essay by Friday. I've to take a day off on Friday for the exam. There's really nothing much I can do about that anyway. My mom has to play the chauffeur on Friday for the kids..well, nothing I can do about it either. She HAS to do it anyway.

Joe's coming over to help me with my studying, and I shall be thankful for his assistance. Ok, Thanks Joe in advance, ya?!

Yesterday, one of my former students, Alyssa Chin called me on the phone from her aunt's place.
She said she misses me...
*Awwwwwwwwwwwwww*
She went on about having exams and asked if I want to speak to her 4 year old younger brother, Nicholas, who yes, is in my current class now. SO CUTEEEEEEE!!!!!!!

I wanted to go to Istana for my grooming class last night, but by the time I got out of Summit, it was already 4.30, not to mention the fact that It Was RAINING and there was a Traffic Jam in front of Summit. *SIGH*. So I just went home to take a rest. I was quite tired and Stressed Out by then. Yeah, I get real stressed out easily..sigh.

Hmm...anyway, just went with AiLing down to KLCC last night. Wanted to get some new year clothes shopping done. We had dinner with Peng Guan. Ya, AiLing met Peng Guan for about the first time in her life. Laynie's already met him before, so I don't think she cares that much. Laynie's met most of my friends ANYWAY, so now it's probably AiLing's turn.

Peng Guan was...ummm..very very tired. He Sounded tired. He Looked tired. I don't know when he doesn't Ever seem tired. But I can sympathise on his behalf lor. But he was still AS Sharp as ever (according to AiLing's perspective).
Peng Guan can be like Annie when he's Energetic.. he he.
Ha Ha, isn't that true, Annie? ;-) I think you know that yourself too. ;-)

By the time we had dinner and started shopping, I was so dead tired, I wasn't even really concentrating on the clothes. Not to mention the fact that Isetan closes real early, but the clothes in Parkson wasn't really nice looking anyway...SIGH. NEVERMIND. I still got time next week AFTER my exam ENDS!

Oh....Ya, the funniest thing happened yesterday during CMS class.

We were all in class yesterday and Mr.Chang was discussing how new vocabulary came about being made and one of the Popular & OverUsed New Words For the Year of 2004 was the word "blog". He was explaining to the class when I exclaimed to Mr. Chang....

Me: Mr. Chang!!!! I have a blog!!! It's like an online diary....whre you write everday.
Mr. Chang: So does anyone read your blog?
Me: Oh, yes Sir! Mr. Chang, I write about you in my blog!! You are one of my favourite topics in my blog, Sir!!!
Mr. Chang: Well, luckily no one in this class reads my blog.

Me: Actually sir, there are people in this class who does read my blog,

(and then I beckoned to someone on the other side of the room with my hand..) There were two people in my said direction...where one was looking blankly in his direction, where the other was just intently looking down and so called reading something....

Mr Chang: From the non-verbal cues that this person shows, who is so avoiding my gaze and looking away intently, I think I know who the person is.....

And the class started laughing again....*lolz*.

=/
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Movies: Elle Woods: Legally Blonde 2.

29/01/2005

Movies: Elle Woods: Legally Blonde 2.

Just borrowed the cd from Fitness First and watched it earlier at home..?

How do I like it? Hmmmm.....Elle Woods reminds me of Anne Shirley.
Which reminds me of Clarissa Explains it All.

Yes, I like Elle Woods.
She may be blonde. She may love shopping.
But DOES NOT MEAN that she is an *Airhead!*

She IS vulnerable.

She may act silly at times.

Or simply jumps into a scenario where ppl make fun and laugh at her.

But she JUMPS BACK. She HAS feelings. She IS human.

And I think that IS exactly WHAT I LIKE about Her.

She reminds me so much of myself. The *Determination* to Fight Back!
;-)

*********************************************************************************

Anyway, for the past one week, I have been at Mabel's place going back and forth in the evening just to complete my artwork. Painstakingly painting and doing all the artwork. On Thursday, I stayed overnight in her place just to get things done by Friday.

However, when Friday came and I went to college bringing all my work, I bumped into two classmates in the lift.

Hei, where's your artwork?

Uh, we both left it at home.

You both what???????


Well, we were busy...
Nah, the teacher doesn't mind so much. She just wants to check, you know?

And there I was going ARRRGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! I almost killed myself with no sleep overnighters and panicking for the past few days! I think I could have strangled the both of them on the spot!
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Di Persimpangan Dilema.....

27/01/2005

Di Persimpangan Dilema.....

Masa berlalu
Tanpaku menyedari
Percintaan yang kita bina
Hampir terlerai

Apa salahku
Kau buatku begini
Dalam dilema
Di antara jalan derita

Tidak pernah kuduga
Ini semua terjadi
Oh!..............

Janganlah engkau
Menghancurkan segala
Setelah lama
Kita mengharungi bersama

Usah biarkan
Cinta kita yang suci
Dilambung ombak
Karam dilautan berduri

Hanya satu pintaku
Moga kau menginsafi
Oh!...............
Telah banyak yang kuberi
Sejak dulu lagi

Pengorbanan tiada pernah jemu
Hanyalah Tuhan saja
Bisa menentukan semua
Kesabaran daku menantimu
Oh!.............

Kutetap memaafkan
Dan berdoa kau kembali
Sebelum diri melangkah pergi
3 comments
Gear box problems.

Gear box problems.

Yup. Yup. My car does have a BIG problem

Problem with the gearbox.

It was leaking and NO gear box oil.....

I had to refill it..

To change and service it would take up to 3 hours.

Plus RM780 ++

I really don't have the kind of time now....eh.

As for the *dough*, I'll just have to speak to my parents.

*lolz*.
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Do Think of me, darling.....

26/01/2005

Do Think of me, darling.....

Think of me

think of me fondly,

when we've said goodbye.

Remember me once in a while

-please promise me you'll try.

When you find that, once again,

you long to take your heart back and be free ....

-if you ever find a moment,

spare a thought for me....

We never said our love was evergreen,

or as unchanging as the sea

-but if you can still remember

stop and think of me

. . .Think of all the things we've shared and seen

-don't think about the things which might have been

. . .Think of me,

think of me waking, silent and resigned.

Imagine me, trying too hard to put you from my mind.

Recall those days

look back on all those times,

think of the things we'll never do

-there will never be a day,

when I won't think of you . .

We never said our love was evergreen,

or as unchanging as the sea

-but please promise me,

that sometimes you will think of me!

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Eternal Flame....

Eternal Flame....

Close your eyes,

Give me your hands, darling,

Do you feel my heart beating?

Do you understand?

Do you feel the same?

Am I only dreaming?

Is this burning, an eternal flame?

I believe it's meant to be, darling,

Watched you when you were sleeping,

You belong with me,

Do you feel the same?

Am I only dreaming?

Is this burning an eternal flame?

Say my name, sunshine's through the rain,

Oh life's so lonely,

You can come and ease the pain,

I don't want to lose this feeling....

Oh is this burning, an eternal flame???????


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Proton Saga: Problematic car.

25/01/2005

Proton Saga: Problematic car.

Ok, I know my previous entry must have sounded really.....*serious*?

It probably sounded real *depressing*, huh?

Hmm...I get like that when I write my entries in at midnight. My entries tend to be more serious.
The first thing that came to my mind this morning was for me to delete it, but not that I look at it again, I think I'll just let it remain on my blog.

It is my own blog after all.

Anyway, MY CAR HAS PROBLEMS!!!

Ok, I'll give you the symptoms. See if you can diagnose the problem.
First it's an old car. More than 10 years and?? its car plate number is WCQ.
Secondly it is an auto car.
Third, I think it has problems with fuel burning or something, coz it doesn't seem to have any "power" when I accelerate??

Anyway, my teacher says that I should go and get it serviced to see what's the problem first.

I get real worried when I drive it coz the car could just break down any moment.!!!!!!!!
Anyway, last night, I wrote an email to two of my course administrators, Shobana and Gloria. When I checked my email account today, I had not got an email. So I called the college. No One Answered!

Then only it struck me!!!
IT'S THAIPUSAM TODAY!!!!!! AIYAHHHHHHHHH!!
How silly was I to even forget that!! *lolz*

Alamak..that means Fitness First is only open till 5pm today!!!

Aiyahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!

******************************************************************************

School was....pretty quiet today. Nothing of interest. Tom and Velex are happily ensconsced in the beginners' 5 years class. I think Tom is feeling much better there with the "older" kids.

Jin Dong, Velex and Tom instinctively comes and give me a hug when they see me. They did that when I went to their class this morning. I get a really warm and fuzzy feeling when they do that.
When I send NicholasNg back, he also does the same. We'll alight from the elevator and I'll walk him out of the elevator where I'll watch him walk back to his babysitter's apartment. But before that, he'll just come and instinctively give me a hug before going off. He does that too when he sees me in the morning.
Now, isn't that just *sweet*?

*Awwwww*

Of course, not all children will do the same lar. Some of them enjoy giving hugs. Some are not used to it. It really depends on their temperament. It takes the child a while to get used to it. Lets not talk about adults who are TOTALLY Not Even Used to It. Lolz. Some people are quite shy about the hugging thing. *lolz*

However, the most important thing is, if a child wants to receive or even give a hug, I think that the adult should not refuse. More so if it's the child's teacher.
I remember, when I was in MKIS, I was in the principal's office. I can't remember the occasion. He was waiting for me to give him a HUG but I Didn't!! I was too darn SHY then!!!! *LOLz*

NOT anymore !! *lolz*

Jasper is so CUTTTTTEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! He's only 2 1/2 years old. But he is so adorably cuteeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!! Jasper has lots to say and he makes the cutest noise and says the cutest things when he's in my car. His ears stick out and he's like this tiny tot..SO CUTE. CUTE. CUTE. CUTE. Very very *cheeky*!
Today when he did the same thing, I made the same noises just to annoy him....wah wah wah.
It was so funny. He just furiously wiggled his head ,shaking his face and covered his mouth with his hands. Lolz.

You know, when my trainer found out that I was a teacher, he started to pretend and talk to me like a kid........and when he couldn't take it anymore, he started laughing and asked how I could stand all those kids asking a *million* questions at once!! *lolz*!!!! He he he.
Each time he walked passed me in the gym, he'll call out Teacher, and turn away! Ha ha ha.

***
Today, I was walking around in the hall, when suddenly Joyce opened the door and asked,
Teacher, why you don't come in???
Teacher got something to do in the hall lar... then I waved to her.

I thought it was very cute. Coz they don't normally ask me that......Awwwwwwwwww

I was in the 4yrs class this morning when the children started coming in one by one. Then NicholasChin came in He gave me this really lopsided look that he would give me everyday when he comes to class.

Yesterday, I was sitting at the table in the hall when his mother brought him in. He just sat on the chair beside me and was wiping tears off his eyes with his hanky. Then I told the mom to leave as he could sit beside me.
He ws just sitting there nicely, then I asked him in Cantonese, why are you crying, Nicky?
My grandma scolded me just now...
(and there I was thinking, hmmm...u cried the other day coz u had a stomachache...let's see what u come up with this time....hmmmm)

would u like to go in or not?.

No, I want to sit with you.

I was writing some reports into my book. I couldn't stand it, so I finally quickly finished writing it and held his hand , ok, you come in with me yah?
So we did. Then u know what? He took the chair and put one bside him.
Giving me this sad puppy face look, he said,

Teacher, u sit beside me okay?
Alamak!

Ok, ok, for a short while, only ya.

:-P
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HoNeYmOoN & ReBoUnD PeRiOds.

HoNeYmOoN & ReBoUnD PeRiOds.

As I have shared with an acquaintance recently,

the longer amount of time I have been with a guy, the shorter the amount of time will the rebound period be.

However, the shorter the amount of time I have been with the guy, the longer the amount of time will the rebound period be.

This is probably, if I have known the guy long enough, we would already have passed the "honeymoon" period. and seen both sides of his personality.
Whereas, in the honey moon period, I'd probably still see him a guy with less flaws. I have experienced this first hand. So basically, that's probably why it took me only 2 months to get over my ex. *lolz*

Oh well. 2 months is already enough time wasted for a rebound period. Mourning for a relationship that will never be rekindled, so WHY WASTE MY TIME???? I hate being in that state of mind.

I remembered the first time I was in the LKS rebound, I had AlexC as an emotional anchor. I told him that it was not the right time for me to be alone by myself because I'd be thinking really depressing thoughts. He was really cool, as I ended up hanging out with his gang of friends and going to the Batu Tiga Racing circuit to watch racing cars in the middle of the night, Barbeques, and other parties as well.
He still remains one of my nicest friends ever, and I really respect him.

I also had another short rebound period last year for someone else, whose name I shall not mention here. Well, thank gawd that is over. It was emotionally draining at times, and I wondered what I had done wrong. I still dunno what happened, but I can sincerely thank the Lord that I am no longer in that state.

Anyway, I am getting older now. I really am not in the mood for "flings", if that is how they say it?
If I am not serious about the guy, I'd probably not want to start the relationship at all.
That's what I told my ex when he asked me not too long ago whether I was seeing anyone or not.
He just went, "oh". and didn't ask any other questions about it after that.

It's very easy for one to jump into a relationship when one is feeling rather vulnerable and lonely. There are many times in the past one year, where I have wondered have I made the right decision to stay single? All I can say is that I have not regretted my decision at all. I am not going to jump into a relationshp just because there is someone, and I'm feeling lonely, so I can just simply take anyone to take my loneliness away. What crap.

I guess, the next relationshp I am going to have with a person, would have to be someone I truly liked and desired. I have no intention of breaking up with him just because I have plans to go overseas.

If the other person looks at it in such a way, I really have nothing to say to that.
Just as my ex said. He said, his feelings just died. I mean what kind of a stupid excuse is that?
Did you even TRY at all?
You just stopped trying and didn't even bother to address your feelings to me till I had to pry them out from you. Do u think I'm stupid??

No less, if I were to have a long distance relationship, it would take considerable commitment and trust from both parties. Since I have NOT been in one as such, it really is difficult for me to predict the outcome.

But anyway, if I really liked the person, and I only had like less than 6 months before I went, I really don't think that there is anything to lose. I never know what I may find out.
4 comments
The things children say!

The things children say!

I really have to emphasize the importance of speaking properly to kids at all times.

A few days back, when the kids got into the car, Ian said,

"Teacher......very HOT lar!"

"Hmmmm....of course I am VERY HOT. The SUN is So HOT today!!"

Then to tease them...

"You mean teacher is feeling hot or , uh, THE car is very hot?"

"Teacher, the car is very hot lar!!"

Then today...

"Teacher......the car is very hot lar!"

My colleague who was listening laughed.

"You told them the other day, they still remember until now!" *lolz*.

"Teacher, the book is very hot!!"

"Teacher, the chair is very hot!!", and on and on and on!

"Ok, Ok....enough already!"
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Lingerie sale & Ad hominem.

24/01/2005

Lingerie sale & Ad hominem.

Muaha ha ha..Talk about lingerie sale.
My maid just told me that there's a lingerie sale (cannot disclose *secret location*)

Muah ha ha....
Hmmmm.......on the prowl for *G-strings* my favourite lower *undergarment* as the term I call it to Mr. Chang.

Mr. Chang, women wear panties, and men wear underwear.

Men don't wear panties.

But you are welcome to tell people that you wear panties anytime. :-)

***********************************************************************************

Anyway, Chin Mun came over to my house at exactly half past three to help me with the CD burning thingy.
My parents were quite pleasantly pleased to see him and asked him a lot about UQ.

I haven't seen Chin Mun.....uh...for almost a year now? He's currently doing his PhD at UQ. Hei, that means I get to see him when I go down north to OZ, eh?

We fiddled a bit with the computer outside and I went into my bro's room to check whether his own computer had any audio problems. You know, networking sure is a pretty good concept. It really saves a lot of time.
************************************************************************************

Shit! I've been accused of NOT dropping My Image. Well, hello Mr.Smarty Pants Friend, I checked up on What you Said, and it DID NOT co-relate. Hah. You bloody Umm....Mr. STILL KEEPING your image, TElling me to DROP my Image. Well. Well. Well.

JUST wait till I Expose you Later then you know. I'm going to TEASE you so BaD!!!!!

What FUN that would be.. see what you have to say later. Ha ha ha. *sticks tongue out*
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It's a Shagedelic Sunday, baby!!!

It's a Shagedelic Sunday, baby!!!

I swear my mum was trying to be funny earlier. She said, i came home. logged online. then slept. then woke up. had dinner. then went out. then came home again and logged on. and then slept again. Hmmm..

I don't find that funny at all???!!!!!!

Anyway, what happened TODAY was I came home from church. Then blogged some.
Then took a nap...great...actually I'm not sure if I had nap now that I think of it...I can't even remember what I was doing earlier....*hmmm*...

I know I blogged and typed in some reports for my Summary of the Day. Then I showered.
After which, I went to a friend's place. After that, I went to Mabel's place to finish up my artwork. My aunt left so much food for me, that I took forever to eat. Mabel had to eat up some of the food instead.
I think we were more busy gossipping than eating. ha ha ha ha ha......

Guys can be SO IMPOSSIBLE sometimes!!! *lolz*. They ask the most impossible questions, that I have to give the most impossible answers sometimes *hits forehead with hand.* Tsk tsk tsk!

We only started work about 9pm and I left the place about 11.30pm and then went home.

Can you believe it that she gave me lingerie??!!!
In hope that I could attract some innocent by stander into my arms..Right right right.
Like that's gonna happen any time soon lar, eh? *rolls eyes*.

I can't exactly go to her place tomorrow as she's going for aikido classes tomorrow evening....How come my taekwondo classes had no cute Japanese ah?? Oh yeah....it was Korean based. Damn sad.
Hopefully she can finish up the painting without me as well.
Now what remains is that I need to know what to make for a portfolio bag!!!

*DIE lar!!*

Ok, this comes to remind me about Mr.Chang.

He was trying to describe "the propogation process between the female and male gender", to which I just screeched out ,"Mr. Chang it is called SEX. Why do u use such long sentences of a gazillion syllables when u can only use one word with one syllable??!!", to which the entire class started laughing yesterday.

Later again, he was trying to link up my name to another student, using some communication icons or something and drew my name, albeit changed to some other spelling in hearts and another student in class, in which I eyed him rather wryly. Right Right Right. The entire class started laughing again as well....

Mr. Chang...Mr.Chang...wait until Isaac comes back again and draws your face without your mop of hair, then you know!!!

But then again, he always says that I'm like the fresh of breath air that comes in to the class each time. *lolz*
And spontaneous as well!!!
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Vanity Fair.

23/01/2005

Vanity Fair.

The screening for Vanity Fair starts next week!

I remember getting the Vanity Fair book, and then realising that I already had the book in the first place but didn't read it. So I had gone with Ben back to MPH Midvalley to return the book. There, we bumped into one of his friends, whom he "signed" to communicate with him. It was an interesting observation, because I have never actually signed to a person who could not totally talk before. And I can sign the entire letters of the English Alphabet!!

Know what? I just realised that I haven't gone New Year clothes shopping.. Now, I don't really fancy wearing anything old on New Year. Don't Think So. Ha ha. Probably get something *red* and flashy, that can be worn throughout the year as well.

Anyway, as I have said, the past entire one week has been most surreal. It would seem almost dreamlike if I didn't pinch myself.

When I got home on Friday midnight, I had texted Karen. Ok, I had initially called to wish her happy birthday pre-New Year's, but it got out of hand and we ended up arguing and the conversation ended at a very bad note and not talking for probably about 3 weeks now.

Karen has been my emotional support (sorta like a small group leader), throughout the entire PG -Dec period, who has been pushing me to do things that I would probably not have done, and to which, I had also resisted.
I know what I wanted, but she was angry that I wasn't doing anything about it, whereas I was angry that she had kept insisting that I did somethng about it.

Well, actually I did do something about it. I, if I may boldly state, threw the results in her face!!
She probably took her time to think about it. I got a text from her this afternoon, apologizing for the whole Pre-New Year fiasco. She probably realised that I DO MEAN what I Say after all. *lolz*. Hah!

Isn't it strange, how some things or suggestions that one makes to another, and the way they respond or react to it can reveal much of how the personality of the other person is like in that flash of insight? It's strange that I never actually thought about it all this while.

Anyway, I got a call this morning. Well, someone called the house at almost 2am. I could hear the phone ringing coz I hadn't gone to bed yet. But I didn't want to pick up the call. So, after church, when I got home, I remembered that someone had called and looked through the Caller ID list. Mmmm Mmm...it was someone I know who had called me.

So I called the person back just now, and when he replied the call, he sounded real sleepy. Well, I told him that he CANNOT under any circumstances call my house after midnight!! Apparently he wanted to go and have supper in the middle of the night.

RIGHT.

Just wait. I'll find out.
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A long week indeed.

22/01/2005

A long week indeed.

A good evening to all..
College was pretty tiring today. I got results for my Play 1 essay. 40/50!!!
The thing about the essay is that I did it like one day before handing it in. So I should not complain!
Now I'm worried about my CMS Essay 3 however!!! *Help!!!!*

Cool leh? Hmm...it was oklar. SY got a 48/50. Hmm...I wonder if anyone can ever out beat that girl!!
Pat only just passed, so I should not be too hard on myself and stop complaining! *lolz*.
And there I was thinking that I was lucky even if I even merely scraped through!!!! *lolz*

My CMS Oral Presentation has to be resubmitted, as the lecturer could not hear the speech on the cd I burnt. I have to reburn the cd again!! Okay, I"m not a techie person in the first place....

Ok, I kinda just woke up, so I am a bit groggy as I write this.. *lolz*
Already had my dinner, but everything is still in a daze now. even after had my dinner.
Got to take my shower soon....

Hmm..this past entire one week has been an experience that I thought I'd never had.
There's been things that has happened to me that I now could probably only state as surreal.
Hmmm...how one's physical needs can really affect the emotional one as well.
Well, that aspect was handled in the most unorthodox manner.
I did things that I surprised myself at!!

Went to the Mega Clinic in Sri Petaling yesterday. Debated with Dr.Devi on the terminology of the vocab "worser". I said that no such word existed besides much more worse than before, or even worst, but worser? I don't think so!
He said he'll go back and check on the terminology, and will give me the answer if I ever go back there the next time! *lolz*

Hai...things we do for fun lar....

Bumped into a friend, Edwin. He walked out rather briskly, from one of the restaurants facing the clinic, and came out to greet me. When I told one of my Brownie troops that I had bumped into him, she was surprised coz she did not at all once bump into him within the past 6 months, whereas I had.
And they all live near each other!

CMS class was fine today. Isaac was absent today...(I wonder where he is...).
Anyway, Isaac is a sports trainer (he trains individuals).
He's got quite a good body (obviously! U can't have a fat guy for a trainer!),
and being Isaac, (if u didn't know the meaning of his name), it actually means laughter!
He is quite a cheeky guy...and I think the class was just as quiet without him today...Awwwww

Mr. Chang (the lecturer), was in just a cheeky mood today. As I entered the class, he said,
"So, our dear girl, I can see you have lost weight",
To which I answered with a drawl, 'yeah right.." and give him a sarcastic look,
...which was his point in illustrating to my use of non-verbal language of tone and look. *lolz*.'
Class with Mr. Chang is always fu. He makes all the students laugh!

Hmm...would I be considered persistent? I never do give up, do I? I guess, until I know the answer, I would still want to know the answer. As long as I am not flogging a dead horse, I should say that everything I do should amount to something. I have Karen to thank for that.
Persistency is a trait of good value. It takes a person with guts to persist in their work, no matter what the cost.
2 comments
Gawd DAMN it.

21/01/2005

Gawd DAMN it.

Hmm..Why dont I ever learn and say that leopards dont ever change their spots?
Hmm.. I was out with this guy, Kevin for dinner.
Well, it was hardly called dinner. More like supper!

He was late by 1.5 hours. He should have known that coming from town would be a congested affair.
Who asked him to be so STUPID????? Even I know that. I'm just pretending not to know and let him learn from his mistakes.

Anyway, he is one annoying bloody farked up guy. *SHIT!* a

asdlfjasdlkjf023980239rlasdfjfa0-2358p0aet9-asdf;aotipweflskafspoeilkldaqu9qwoluio[awd;fksd;koq0-239-59eu9dfl;adjgf9034905830295890458 390ldfjlasdjkfaj;otefuaeto23095820399235-df;kaa'-0t-a0w9-2352=5923=-5w349pi3iasef;fk;;sda5689 35-923-0592-9;alaef'pefspot ii!!!! 0932489023809~!!!!!!!!!!!!

AND PERVERT AT THAT!!!!!
I may be HoRnY but that doesn't mean others can behave that way to ME!!!

I hate guys who try to go past the limits of acceptable social behaviour. A guy CANNOT simply try to touch a girl if the girl didn't allow him TO!!!!!!!!! WHAT AN IDIOT!!!!

23094802398aljsdfkl;jalsdjflasjfl4892-492-90-!!!! 02938905 8q902358aejflwjlaj!!!!!!!w490 5238908a0fasljflsfj;sdalfjaskldfj;aljsf;klaadjsljfljlasdjflakfjl1!!!Oioapquiowerwagiouba,sfno1080w34989090!()!!!!!!!!!9023890890~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HE can FUCK himself in HIS dreams before I ever go out with Him again!!!!!!

q2089348109480af;sldfqoiuowqerty afsdlfjalsdfjo0398590158alsfjlasdfjl;23908235823958aelfjlasjfl .my sos woathso;goiasofuwoiruweoalsu shitlst suhit. shit. shit. soafuiru290382903lasfjashit. shit sthoasfohoishits shisti fuck fark aousfifuo90shit shit shit. shitaothasi 3290829081`9012890 14890248190189021489290

And calling yourself a gentleman? A gentleman will not talk dirty stuff to a girl.
He would also offer to carry her books and also open the door for her.

*Rolls EYES*

Mather Farker.
2 comments
I AM Bloody *HoRnY* and I'm *FLaUnTiNg* it.

20/01/2005

I AM Bloody *HoRnY* and I'm *FLaUnTiNg* it.

Right. I AM bloody Horny and I AM flaunting It.

You don't believe your eyes? Go see an Optician.

Who's to say that Girls ARE NOT Horny?

Wake up and Smell The Roses.

I'm sure that there'll be ladies out there who feel that SEX is a Taboo Subject.

And YES. IT IS.

But if you push the right buttons, YOU never know Find OUT what you may just want to know. ;-)

Ladies who go around pretending to be chaste, etc. etc. etc. As I have said before...then again, there are people who talk all about it but don't do it. And there is the other group which is Vice Versa. ;-)
1 comment
Streamyx up again!! and Assignments!

19/01/2005

Streamyx up again!! and Assignments!

Alright baby!!!

Went to FF Axis for work out. Came home for dinner with Asta. The food was okay lar....as least can save money mah!!! ;-)

Just came from a meet up with Kong at Nathan's.
We discussed some *serious* stuff. Heh...like we also do. (Asia Works mah!).

Anyway, I'm up to my neck with assignments. Just a review so u all know whats up on my schedule...

Main items:
1) 2 lesson plans (with implementation, evaluation and personal learning), and 1 Summary of Day daily (for each day I clock in).

2) Observation and lesson plan programming for my Play Unit assignment (due on 4th of February- thankfully an extension has been provided in lieu of the normalisation period for the children).

3) CMS1000 exam on the 4th of February!!!! u say *die* or not?? 3 hours exam at SIC.

Secondary items:
4) Practising organ.

5) Going to the gym.
2 comments
Prime College Computer Lab 1

15/01/2005

Prime College Computer Lab 1

The past few days have been....umm...okay. Logged online at Mabel's place last night. Ya. I have trouble with artwork design and painting, so I had to ask her for help lor. Mabel just took one look ar my work and said, man, this is so easy lar..nevermind! I do all.

and then shook her head at my ..umm.....dis-toned drawing in black 8B pencil of an apple...

Uh..right, what is Harmonious Colours already?

I am colour blind lar.

Ya...and my uncle Tony and aunt came over to our table and asked,
Hei, your mummy cannot draw one??
Aiya, your brother cannot draw one. I see him before...sai lei man!!

I said to Uncle Tony, uncle, I may not be able to draw, but I at least I can write essays mah..

To which Mabel said, eh, next time I got essay to write...I ask you ah?

I started laughing. Ha ha ha...

I Think she needs more than just grammar and vocab restructuring.....*lolz*.

Anyway, my ex told me that his ex colleague was looking for a place to shoot for a short tv-movie or something of that sort, and he suggested me.....
I took pictures, but since I don't have internet access at home, I could only give the Url of online gallery pictures of my school kids last year. Hope that is good enough for him however.

*Heh*.

A friend of mine just made the most interesting *suggestion* to me. Hmmm....I still haven't made up my mind whether to take it up or not.
*lolz* The thing is, it's not the first time someone suggested it to me. But this time, I am thinking more seriously about it. Ha ha. I dunno if the decision would affect me in anyway.
No comments
my Streamyx connection is down.

my Streamyx connection is down.

Hi. My streamyx connection has been down for the past couple of days.

Dunno why, or whether it is i havent paid my bills...

*The bills were missing from the mail for the past month.....*

So if u don't see any new entries for the next couple of days, u know what happened lar...

Anyway, Bridget Jones' Diary 2 is OUTTTTTT!!!!!!

Who WANTS to see please inform me!!! I can't wait to see it.

I'll be watching Aviator at Summit College tomorrow!!! See Ya!!!!
No comments
Day 7 of School: internship 2nd Day.

11/01/2005

Day 7 of School: internship 2nd Day.

Summary of today:

Today was much better today. Having analysed my situation yesterday, I realised what it is I had to do today.
This morning, I spoke to Lillian about my intentions, and what it is I had to teach. Apparently she DIDN'T realise that my scope of work was NOT just limited to the Practical Life and Sensorial, but the entire syllabus from Mathematics, Literacy, Cultural and even Art!.

Anyway, today was much better than yesterday. This morning, Joyce's mother came and complained that her daughter had a scratch on her ribs. From what I know, and can remember, I don't remember her crying or screaming loudly last night out of any accidents or pain. But the Joyce put the blame that Brenda had pushed her, and wanted to speak to Lillian, since the latter was the one who was mostly looking after her. Joyce's mother somehow seemed to be appeased by Lillian's explanation later.

Only 11 were present in class today. Jasper cried a little after his mom left, but was ok after a while. Guo Xuan didn't cry much. There were two new children, Nicole and Shan-Shan. Shan-Shan was crying continously the entire morning, till the extent that her elder sister had to come down. Fortunately Shan-Shan did not vomit! The sister seeing her cry, cried as well, so I told the elder sister to go back to her class, as if not, both of them will be crying TOGETHER as well!

Overall, the class went well. I showed the children how to sit in a circle in the hall. I told them how to take the mat from the mat "corner". I took a while to get their attention, but I managed to show them how to roll the mat, and I showed them how to lay out the mat on the floor without throwing it. Then I showed them how to unroll the mat, and roll the mat back using two hands to carefully roll it back properly.

As for the Large Number Rods, this time, the group was divided into half. The group was smaller, so the children had more individual attention. Some of the kids didn't want to follow, so they stayed in the class doing other class work given by Lillian. They could still identify the third rod, which would be more difficult as the rods are more and more compartmentalised by the colours as I add on more later.

After school was over, and the kids had all gone home, I spoke again to Lillian, that I would have to co-ordinate my lesson planning with her, so that I would be able to accomplish the objectives laid out for the children, and she would keep the other half of the children to do other work with them.

************************************************************************************

Rolling Mat (Practical Life).

Evaluation: The children were able to follow the lesson well. They enjoyed rolling the mat. Although they were "going in & out" of the lesson, they still managed to follow and observe the others rolling the mat.
7 other children were absent, so I'd have to do the same lesson with them later when they return.

Personal Learning:


************************************************************************************

Large Number Rods: Rods 1, 2 & 3

Evaluation: The children were able to follow as well. Cheng Wei, although he didn't speak much (actually, he hardly spoke much since the the first day of school!), was able to listen and follow the instructions given. He could identify the rods asked, and could roll the mats well as well. Eugene couldn't follow however.

Personal Learning: (will write later......).

No comments
Day 6 of school

Day 6 of school

Today is Day 6 of school.
It is different today, as I have to already start planning lessons for the 3 & 4 years class.
I write my lesson plans in this thick lined hard cover book, and transfer it onto the computer where I'll type it out later. So I don't have to actually do my thinking in front of the computer. LIke do my work, when I'm still at the office.
When one is just merely observing, there's not as much as work.

But I also have to write a summary of my school day that I clock in, so it's like telling a "mini" story for the placement tutor/ internship co-ordinator/ moderator to read, and helps clarify the situation as told.
I also have to write the implementation of the lesson plan, evaluation and also personal learning. Damn
So much work to do.

I think I may have to remove part of the entry below later, as IT is, I think quite personal. Personal for the kids, that is. But this is later, once I've got it transferred and printed to my file.
So, for the rest, Enjoy learning from it, for as long as u can till I REMOVE it.
************************************************************************************

Summary: Early in the morning, I had told Lillian that I was going to take half the kids for my class. However, instead, she SENT all the kids out. So after seating them down on the mat, I had to send back the other half of the class back into the class. No doubt that there were 3 kids still not normalized. I had already told her half, I don't know why she still had to send ALL of them out to me. Still, she cant just send them all out to me just because they were already normalised, as she has her own part of the teaching to do instead.

Before starting the lesson, I asked Lillian to send the kids out to the hall and asked them to sit on the bench, since it's their first time that I started their lesson. I asked them to sit on the bench first. Then I went to carry the mat out. I showed them how to lay the mat out on the floor, and how to roll it out.

I had actually prepared to only teach them how to do 'pegging' today, but I forgot that I had also have to teach them how to roll the mat before that.(as I am following according to the index of exercises that I have to do, rolling the mat is considered part of the ground rules orientation lessons, and a separate lesson by itself. I think. I have to check this with the internship co-ordinator again).

So I have to do that tomorrow. Then I showed the children how to sit around the mat.I brought the kids, one by one to sit around the mat, and told them that NONE of them are supposed to ever walk on the mat. I showed them how to sit akimbo (cross their legs, that is), and that they are not to sleep on the mat when the lessons are done.

Anyway, Lilian had sent out practically the entire class out to me. So I 'threw back" half the class to her, coz I already told her that we are going to divide the class into half, and I didn't want too many children out in the hall.
I showed the children how to hold the peg, and illustrated to them that mummy uses it to dry clothes on a sunny day. I presented to them how to hold the peg, peg it onto the basket, then remove it and put it bck into the basket. Quite a number of them didn't know how to even hold the peg at all. It was like this 'strange" foreign alien thing to them. Brenda, the African girl, was initially hesitant to do it. She held it, then stopped. So I asked her to observe and do it later. Jasper, the new boy, was pegging halfway. Then his father who was observing then quietly left. He started to cry. He couldn't complete the pegging exercise. I let Brenda do the pegging exercise later. She was able to complete it. All the children were able to do the pegging exercise.

I also planned to teach Large Number Rods with the children today. However, apparently Lillian had different ideas. She wanted me to use the Short bead Stair (number 1, red bead) to show to the kids, so that we could go into using the workbook soon! I wanted to teach the kids to identify Rod No 1 & 2, so that they could be able to point out the different rods, and arrange it up to 10. She feels that they could learn quickly because it was just Number 1. I didn't think so, coz the group was so big, and a smaller group was needed so I could identify if they understood or not. So, ended up, we wasted time arguing on that point instead of actually going straight to the lesson. HMMPH!! I was so exasperated and Annoyed! She thought that I was going to teach both Short Bead number 1 and LNRod at the same time. As if! One material at a time. I cant teach so many things at one time because I feel that it is very disorderly.

Nonetheless, I laid out the mat and asked the kids to sit around the mat. I taught them Rod No 1 & 2 in isolation, and asked them to point out the rods.

************************************************************************************
Pegging exercise-
Evaluation: The children took to the pegging exercise quite easily. They could relate to the exercise more easily when I told them how the peg was used at home, as some of them may have seen their moms or the maid at home using it.

Personal learning: I think its important I communicate with Lillian clearer on what my objectives with the children are, so that there will be no misunderstanding between the both of us. I also have to communicate with Lilian on what her intentions are, so that there is NO misunderstanding and that there will no time wasted when the lesson plans are to be executed out.

Its important that teachers understand that they have to be patient with kids and where the children are coming from. Its easy to scold the kids, calling them incompetent, when basically the children themselves have no idea how to work an object.
************************************************************************************
Large Number Rods: Teaching rods number 1 & 2.

Evaluation: The children were able to identify rods number 1 & 2 when pointed out. They were able to follow the lesson of 1 & 2.

Personal Learning: As a result of what happened, I felt that lesson went quite topsy turvy. I think I have to communicate with Lillian that I cant teach so many things at one time, and that I will only be presenting one material at each time, and be focusing ONLY on that material, so that the children will not get mixed up.

I will not present the Short Bead Stair, if it weren't in an entire stair, because I want the children to know that the red bead stair is part of a bigger group of 10, and does not just stand alone by itself, else it would have no meaning.
Just as I would not just teach only on Large Number Rod without a second number rod, and I will not be able to determine if the children understand the difference between 1 without a 2 or if they know the difference between 1 & 2 or not.
I would have to communicate with Lillian on how I intend to teach using the materials, and that there is a precise procedure and philosphy behind it to do so.
No comments
About time to get a boyfriend, not husband, mind you.

10/01/2005

About time to get a boyfriend, not husband, mind you.

Arrrrrgggghhhhhhhhhhhh!!!
This is probably the first time I've mentioned it here, but about the 100th time I'd have mentioned it to Annie or Asta by now. Hmmm....for the past ONE year (according to Asta anyway).

Ha ha ahhah

Thing is....uh. Can I manage my time to *squeeze* in one?

When I was with my ex, I purposely took the evening classes. Just for HIS sake. Coz I wanted to spend more time with him on weekends. (hint. hint. Now you know why I NEVER took up the offer of changing to Saturday classes no matter how many times my mother *badgered* me to..)

I always felt *guilty* for not spending enough time with him, and also enough time for MY Assignments!

Well that didn't last, and *ironically* I have to do Saturday classes now anyway!

Hmmmmm...

Ha ha ha Ha.

Can I make enough time for my gym?

Can I make enough time for my studies?

Can I make enough time to complete my assignments?

Can I make enough time to spend with my friends alone (without a pest of a boyfriend to be hanging around)?

Can I make enough time for MYSELF?

* OK, First and Foremost,

I need to find some *candidates*.

OK, who knows any? ;-)

***********************************************************************************

On the other hand, Annie can alraedy *swim* now after 4 lessons....she must be damn genius man! ;-)
. Wah Lan.

Dunno how good she is...

Ahhh I still DUNNO how to swim.....Die Die Die Die Die Die Die Die.

Who wants to give me swimming lessons, ah?

Maybe I'll take it up before going overseas too. heh. ;-)

Hmmm...but then again, my trainer gives me workout trainings without my ever asking him to..
So I'd be darned if I said I'm not a *lucky* gal!!!
6 comments
XiaXue deleted FoXur's entry

09/01/2005

XiaXue deleted FoXur's entry

She deleted the entry on FuXor coz he *apologized*

LOLZ

I think she was just annoyed. Either that, she was UPSET?

Either that, or she was TOO Free.

Not to mention, she DIDN'T ALLOW comments on her newest entry.

LoLZ.

I think she was sick of all the Profanity in the Comments by ALL The readers.

LoLz.

I'd like to comment on Churches these days. In regard to the OverZealous Christians.

In my Communications Studies, I learn that to be a compelling speaker, one must present a speech that will not only the listeners understand, but also what they need.
One of the main questions, when I go into a class (if it IS NOT COMPULSORY), is, WHAT DO I GET OUT OF THIS? I will be spending my next two hours in the hall, and I will be putting myself at risk to waste my time. If I DON'T get anything out of this, I will NOT come in future. Period.

I think the same goes for the evangelists, churches and those who would like to go street evangelising.
Most evangelists and church goers seem to think that Accepting Christ is like an Event.

Well, that's not True.

Because that is a Mistake.

Like buying shoes, or even deciding to make a purchase, accepting Christ is a process over a long period of time. I look at the goods. I think about it. I go backwards and forwards in my mind about it. Well, perhaps it's good? Maybe I don't really need it after all.
Same goes for sharing Christ with others or converting to Christ. What is so GOOD about Christ?
Why SHOULD i even Consider Him?

Accepting Christ is a very very long process. Which could take as long as many many years before one would even reach a decision. some 20 years. some 30 years. some maybe even longer.
How often do Christians who would like to evangelise to other actually take time out to LISTEN TO OTHERS? It's not just about evangelising.

Humans want someone to listen to their needs. Atheists wants to know that if they convert, that this particular "god" can MEET their needs. Even Christians.

If Christians don't bother to take time listening others, but instead try to shove facts down other people's throats in hope that THEY will listen, atheists, and even not so fervent Christians will be repulsed by them.

I say this, because I once went for this seminar. Ok, it was one of those meetings during the Christian convention in Penang. Seriously, I thought the classes they had were a TOTAL waste of time. I didn't gain anything out of there. First, I could hardly hear the speaker. Secondly, the speech that the speaker had to say was so boring. Third, there was hardly any participation from the audience.

Finally, I just walked out of the class. I DON'T CARE.
Later I confided to my dad about it. Apparently, he had the same perspective that I had of the classes held.

Same goes for atheists, and those who goes to a church meeting. Most of the time, the atheist will walk into a church for the first time. Everything there is so disorientating.
He doesn't understand what the songs mean. In fact, they lyrics have no meaning for him at all??

He doesn't understand what the preachers say. The sermon doesn't meet his needs. In fact, he HAS NO IDEA what the preacher is going on and on and on and on about. *YAWN*

He is totally PUT off by the speaker or the rest of the worshippers who seem to HOUND on him.

Oh YOU MUST ACCEPT Christ!!

Oh, You DID? Oh That is SO GOOD!!! Wah WAH WAH.


Oh gawd. SCARY!!

*Shudders*

They go into the church tat very first time. Then they VOW to NEVER EVER attend or go back to church, or any other church in their life again.

You ever got that feeling?

What Have YOU got to say about That?

I think that ALL Church leaders NEED to go for Communications Classes. In fact, it should be MADE COMPULSORY.
No comments
Engagement dinners, weddings and USQ.

Engagement dinners, weddings and USQ.

Well, apparently Lisbeth wanted to hand in her assignment personally, and it was not that Gloria didn't want to accept her assignment. YES. I checked out the information with Gloria yesterday whilst at college.
The only DIFFERENCE is that, Lisbeth's assignment would be stamped the next day, meaning to say that, her assignment is already Considered LATE, meaning that she would get a DEDUCTION from her marks.

TOO BAD. If you don't show concern for your assignments, NO ONE will.

Secondly, you CAN'T call the staff who work in the college, IDIOTS! If you can't grow up and take responsibility at your age (she looks 40 over to me), you will never ever grow up to take responsibility for your own actions. You can't look beyond the speck in your eye. And seriously, I PITY you as a human.

Yesterday night, I went for my cousin, Florence's engagement dinner. I had a really great time getting together with Debbie and George as well. Heh.
Ok, seriously, I was already zonked out after being out the entire day at college. 9am to 4pm, and then almost half dead by the time I was done with my grooming classes at 6pm. The dinner was at 7pm. I could barely stay awake the entire night. The evening just passed away in a blur.

I went out with George to get a Cafe Latte at the cafe below the restaurant. Anyway, on my way up, I saw the bridegroom who was having a wedding dinner together at the same time in the same restaurant where my cousin had her engagement dinner.

He loooooked real familiar, and I saw a cut on his eyebrow. He saw me. I saw him. I turned away and walked past. I turned back and walked to him..

Are you from Sri Inai?

Uh....yes I am.

Are you Kok Weng?

Oh YES!! You are??

I'm......D******.

You are??Serious? I didn't recognise you!

..............

Are you the one getting married tonight?

Yes..

Oh, congrats then! (Shakes his hand).

Are you here with the others? Tatt Ghee and Siew Yang are here....

Oh, I haven't seen them yet. My cousin's having her engagement dinner tonight.

Anyway, Ok, I'll catch up with u later then!

Then I walked back to my cousins.I told them that the bridegroom was my classmate. 25 years old only....
Then later when I spoke to them, another cousin of theirs, Lisa, had joined them.

Hei, we're trying to see if the bride is PREGNANT or not.......one of them said.

Oi....ha ha ha ha ha..SO BAD.

But then again, Kok Weng seems a bit......young to get married. *lolz*.
Whats this thing about guys getting married so early, these days?
My last couple of classmates who got married was due to *accidents*, you know? ;-)

Anyway, my parents told me that there was NO need for me to Greet Jane for any reason.
Let me explain why. Last night, when she came, she sat down. She had brought a Guy Friend along.

First and foremost, unless one is SERIOUSLY dating a guy or a girl, you would NOT bring him or her back to a family function, and especially one that includes extended members of family, i.e cousins, aunties, uncles, grandparents. etc.
I think this holds not for the Asian, but as well for the Western families. Unless you want tongues to wag.
And I don't bring one, JUST so that he could have a FREE dinner.

Secondly, when she sat down, I offered her to shake a hand. To which, she said something, that I can't remember, and refused to shake mine. My parents were AFFRONTED. I just Ignored her after that however.

This morning, when I was going to church, my mom told me that there is no need for me to speak to Jane or to greet her for any reason. Jane has to get off her HIGH HORSE, and learn to be meek, humble, and that I as her cousin, had already DONE my part by offering to greet her.
If she CAN'T accept it, there's really nothing much another party can do, if she still WANTs to REMAIN her old stubborn self.
Thank you, BUT NOT my LOSS.
She ALSO is another one who IS NOT ABLE TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY for her own actions.
I PITY her, and seriously, I FEEL SORRY for her, coz she CAN'T GROW UP.
No comments
Day4 in school

08/01/2005

Day4 in school

No assembly in school today. The 4 years old class (plus the younger ones) are still not normalised yet.
Actually, its only Jasper, Tze En, Guo Xian who did all the crying and affected the rest of the class. *sigh*

I asked Priscilla to wipe the table today. Priscilla didn't know how to wipe the table, so I had to show her how to do it. It was important that I had let Tom to do that earlier, as he was acquainted with that practice since last year, and it allows other newer children to observe him doing it, so that they would want to join in as well (like Tom Sawyer and the wall whitewashing business affair!)

Surprisingly, without my asking, Tom asked later IF he could wipe the table instead later. He showed me the part where Qing Zhe had drawn on the table.

Today, Tze En's father left. It's time some weaning between father and daughter happens. Jasper and Tze En ends up forming an attachment to me. *lolz* and starting crying and crying coz I couldn't be there coz I had to send the kids back. Of course, Lillian was there to jaga what. Guo Xian stopped crying coz his elder sis was there.

Emily didn't cry today. That is SO amazing. Hmmm.....did drawing in the morning. Then we went out to the hall for circle time and sang some English, counting, sunday school, and Ants on the Apple! After which was break time, then proceeded to music and movement and dance in the hall with me playing the organ, and then Play Ground time.

Wheeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!! What FUN!!!!!!!!

Last night, I told my mother what it is I had written down here in my blog. I braved myself to tell her that. And this afternoon, when I sent Bee Sien home, she told me that my mom told her exactly what I had said last night. Word for Word. Verbatim.

Woah.

I know my mom. Coz in a way, I am exactly like her. If ppl tell me to do something, and I DON'T SEE the RATIONALE behind the action, I totally REFUSE to do it. That's the way to HANDLE my mom.
And that GOES FOR me as well.

The kids played computer the entire afternoon. Wow. What fun. I had the computer to myself alright.
Doing assignments is SO MUCH fun.

In retrospect, I'm feeling quite disorientated , being there just assissting Lillian, as I'm used to being the one handling my own class instead. However, I'll be the one doing most of the observation reports. I am definitely GOING to MAKE Sure Lillian KNOWS taht, and she CANT TAKE credit for that. Sometimes, we have do some ADVERTISING for ourselves.
No comments
Penalty for handing in assignments late.

Penalty for handing in assignments late.

Today, I thought I was going to be late in handing in assignments.

I really thought so. I was bloody panicking that Gloria would not log in my assignment.

This time, I *forgot* my acknowledgement letter. The second time around! SY hit her hand against her head when I told her that..

I reached college about 5.30pm. By the time I handed in my assignment, it was already 6pm. (sitting at Gloria's table just stapling the papers and making sure the details on the folder is completed. etc. etc.).
Anyway, about almost 7pm, when it was time for class, I saw Lisbeth (the one who loaned me her CMS textbook for photocopying and runs a kindergarten in United Garden as well) came out and asked me for her textbook back. Before I could actually complete my reply, she then angrily demanded that, if I were not to return her book by tomorrow, I'd have to *pay* her back for the book, whatever it is THAT she had paid.
Well, that really is not the problem.

The problem was, later when she went into class, she spoke to some other classmates, and then, all of a sudden she LOUDLY told me off in front of everyone that IF I were not to return her book BY tomorrow, she'll SCOLD me again.

I also overheard that the administrator, Gloria wanted to log in her assignment, but one of the other seniors (i'm not sure of the details), said NO, because she was late by 2 hours!

Well, Well Well. So as a result, she HAS to send in the assignment herself PERSONALLY to USQ.

Lisbeth's rationale was that why can't the college just log in her assignment and put in a late check in time for her assignment??

Well, the college can't do that for one student, coz if they do, they'll have to start doing it for every other student who does that as well. Besides, it's good to teach Lisbeth a lesson.

Well, frm my perspective, Lisbeth has the RESPONSIBILITY to hand in her assignment in time, as stipulated during the Orientation. She just assumed that she could waltz into the college at 7pm, and that the college would log her assignment in there and then, just bcoz the administor was in. Not to mention the fact that, Lisbeth is already in her 3rd year intake of the course, meaning taht she is alraedy in her 4th semester with the college now. She SHOULD know better.
This differs from another student, who had prior asked for an extension for her assignment, but still had not received an answer yet, whereas Lisbeth DID NOT ask for an extension.

Well, I was pretty cheesed off by her attitude. You can't just vent on someone else JUST BECAUSE you are angry. However, I didn't want to pick an argument with her, as I already knew that she was quite worried about her assignment.
As a result, she didn't come in for the Arts class tonight, and would have to work on alone with a lot of the assignments that could have been done in class today.

Well, serves Lisbeth right for being such an insolent pain in the ass. (the thing is, she reminds me of my mom when MY mom is in a pissed off mood!). So I will not comment any further.

As for the cut off time to hand in assignments, I will check with Gloria later to ask for her feedback about what happened yesterday. I dont want to Repeat the same brainless mistakes others happen to do.

***********************************************************************************

I've been reading XiaXue's guestbook comments on the past two current entries in regard to FuXor.

One thing strikes me is that, there are many comments written there in a very highly subjective manner.

As my communication studies goes, one thing that strikes me, and will be reinforced as I go through it is that, if a person is able to write well convincing arguments objectively, and with factual proof to back it up, without sound biased or prejudiced against others, discerning readers/ people who read it or hear it, would agree with it more readily.
Some of the readers spouted out a lot of bullShit which I shall say, got told off by other readers coz they didn't know how to present themselves properly in other people's blogs.Well, SERVES them Right!
No comments
The Foolish shall confound the Wise.

06/01/2005

The Foolish shall confound the Wise.

You know, I have this habit of talking to myself when I'm alone driving my car. I can scream, and shout, and yet no one else can hear me.
How peaceful. Ya, a personal soliloquy within the confines of my car.

Ya, no one to think that i'm MAD.

As most of my friends know, I chauffeur the kids back and forth from school. Coz no one else wants to take the job, I have to. Actually, I have no other option to do so. *pissed!!* Whatever.
Anyway, after I'm done sending the kids back, and end up alone with one child, I have this habit of verbalising my personal soliloquy.....
Normally, I tend to forget that the child is there coz they normally don't talk.
I'll Loudly ask myself questions, to which, *LOL*, sometimes the kids would answer me, thinking that I had asked them a question.

Back to the story...well, we were going to have a teachers' meeting this afternoon, and I was feeling pretty shitty, anxious and worried about the whole thing.
So I started to pray that I would have the strength to enter the meeting later, and that nothing would go wrong, being so worked up the entire morning after being ticked off by the principal and the whole fiasco about my kids from last year in Ambigai's class.

I said this as I drove, thinking that the kid, Nicholas probably didn't hear me. Well.....

SUDDENLY!

Out of nowhere Nicholas muttered that his father and him prayed every morning before he went to kindergarten that Jesus will make him strong!

I was so surprised beyond myself that I didn't know wat to say, but the first thing that came to my mind was, How WISE God is, that he has said that, The Foolish Shall Confound the Wise.

Never I, in a million years, would ever think that out of a boy, no more than just 4 years old, would tell me the very thing that I so wanted to hear so much at that very moment.

I wanted to hug and kiss him all over, coz it gave me the reassurance, no matter how fake, or real, that I feel that all would go well during the meeting later!

Well, all did go well later. Amen!!

Psalms 8:2 Out of the mouth of babes and sucklings hast thou ordained strength because of thine enemies, that thou may silence the enemy and the avenger.

YET,

"...God hath chosen the foolish things of the world to confound the wise; and God hath chosen the weak things of the world to confound the things which are mighty;" *** I Corinthians 1:27
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A successful Preschool program.

A successful Preschool program.

A successful preschool program, from my perspective, is that it not only is able to meet the parents' expectations, but meet the children's needs as well.

In a highly academic focused society like Malaysia, parents have requested that their kids ask for more written work, or evidence that work is done in school. Actually, the fact is, from my readings, I have realised that this situation is not only restricted to Malaysia, but to almost the rest of the world, and in this particular instance, Australia, since I'm doing my studies under USQ. (hence, relevance to Australian society.).

Parents are requesting for homework. Homework u ask?
Some parents seem to enjoy watching their children doing homework!!! Oh my gawd!!!
At the age of 4? You must be MAD! I'd say.

But seriously, it is happening. And in my own kindy as well. Horrors of all Horrors!

I know that some kindys try to sell to parents that their children will learn much from staying longer hours. But from what I have heard and seen, sometimes parent's expectations may not translate well into success, if children's needs are not taken into account.
If the longer hours programme in the afternoon is something where all children do is more writing and writing and homework! (and if u even consider that learning at all, I really...really must PRAY HARDER for you. I hope you don't have children and put them through such torture. I really DO!) I can tell you the programme will not be successful in the long run. A handful of kids may come, but that IS ALL to it.

The thing is, if you impose such a syllabus on kids, children in their own way, are NOT STUPID. They will rebel. Its like forcing someone to do something that they do not enjoy. It is true that children may not have the ability to object as well as an adult when they highly dislike something. But they will find ways of avoiding it, sometimes so subtly, that one as a teacher may not realise it.

However, if the child knows that the afternoon programme would have many exciting lessons or experiences that they could not find during the morning session, I can bet you that they'd quickly finish their lunch, homework (from the morning session) just anticipating what the next new activity could be!

To illustrate my point, I have had the instance whereby I had the priviledge of teaching this kid, Chen Siu tutorial classes. She was only 6 then. Her mom had no time to teach her, so she asked me for remedial help. It was mostly to help her learn her spelling. Because she was not so good in memorizing, I had used many ways to help her learn her spelling, like giving her treats, playing games with letters, as long as this girl wouldn't feel bored. Seriously, I don't like my teaching sessions to be boring and dull. As they say, when learning is fun, you as a student would look forward to the next lesson. Anyway, one day, I decided to use my scrabble set to teach her how to spell. It took foreeeeeeeeever for to get the correct letters.

Howver, the strangest thing was, in lieu of this, some time after that, I heard another kid telling me that ChenSiu had told her that she had the best time learning spelling with me. I was pretty surprised because I didn't expected it!!! In fact, she asked if I could TEACH HER tuition....I was so speechless I had nothing to say (coz I had no intention of actually teaching others that time!)

Anyway, the truth or the objective I'm trying to make here is, in a business, its the client themselves (here, the kids that is), that you have to please as well. If the kids have an enjoyable time, day after day, they will tell other kids. This in return, will make the other kids long to join in the fun as well, coz they want to join in the bandwagon and not be left out of it. As a result of their longing, they may tell the parents that they want to stay longer in school , which ultimately translates to more income for the school.

I must say that advertising works well, especially mouth to mouth from one kid to another!
In this instance, I'm sure that the parents themselves would be pleased coz their kids seem to enjoy going to school so much and want to stay on even longer!

Don't You Agree?
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3rd day of School.

05/01/2005

3rd day of School.

Velex has been *promoted* to the 5 year old class! Argh. I dunno if it was done in good intentions, by his mom. I obviously don't agree with the mum's decision on that. The mom spoke to me after class, stating that she didn't want the kid to be in the same class as he was last year.
I must have look really *distressed* coz she told me not to look so worried & that he was going to cope in that class. But I seriously don't think he could cope in that class. Sure, he's normalised and all. Still....I don't think he is developmentally ready for 5 year old work at any point of time. He's such a little dottie!
Anyway, he's got Jin Dong for company, worst comes to worst. I didn't like it at all when Jin Dong's mom asked for her to go up to the class as well!! She's just as bad as she's much more younger than Velex, although bigger in size.

***Hmmmph!***

But I'm gonna *miss* the kid.
Wah Wah Wah Wah Wah Wah Wah Wah Wah Wah Wah. I'm going to cry already..Wah Wah Wah Wah...
Wah Wah Wah Wah Wah Wah Wah Wah Wah Wah Wah Wah Wah Wah Wah Wah Wah Wah

She decided to change the topic by saying I lost weight and got fairer during the holidays. Yeah Right.

Today, an African Muslim kid came to class. 3 1/2 yr old. She was quite Big Sized for her age. Something like Loke Yang. Her hair was......afro style. It's probably the first time I've been acquainted to Afro hair in a long time. *lolz*. She was crying and crying for so long in the morning, and then by mid morning, she stopped. I feel that her mom shouldn't have just left her alone and at least stay a little to have observed. I don't think that it was very responsible of the parents to not help her get acquainted with the school environment. She after all, is not even 3 yet, and her first day of school! How irresponsible!

The parents stayed out of the classroom today. But some of them still remained to outside to stay watch.

The children played playdough and some of the dramatic kitchen play materials for about half an hour or so, before going up the hall to watch some tv. The tv couldn't catch their attention as much as the playdough, it seems. We sang some songs, and after which, had our break time.

Then after, we had another circle time, and sang Ants on the Apple, and I signed with them the letters, A, B, C and D. Can't do too many in one session!

I only realized that after the children came into circle time, they begin to realise that they could have some fun. The Afro girl, Line, was holding the other boy's hand, after which she started running around the class! Horrors!
3 of them started to run around madly aroun the class. One extremely hyper kid knocked into almost every one else.
However, the children seem to have settled down by the time they went out into the garden. They really seem to enjoy looking and feeding the rabbits, and also looking for grass, leaves to feed the rabbits.
Not soon after, it was almost time to go home. What a long day!
Tomorrow, we're gonna start on lesson proper. Hopefully everything turns out well, as I'll have to prepare lesson plans today.

Come to think of it, I think Play groups are good, where mothers/fathers take their kids to get acquainted with other kids. They have such sessions in UK (from the books I have read that is). The toddlers play with one another and the mother/father just watches. Unfortunately, the parents in Malaysia are more worried about working than the needs of the child. Companies here don't even give leave to the fathers when their kids are born. Do u know how stressful it is for the mother when the child is first born? Sleepless nights of breastfeeding, baby crying in the middle of the night, dark circles and all that.

Since we're on this topic, I'd like to touch on the topic of mothers.
Mothers are like, the most essential person in every child's life. Women may not be given as much rights as the Man in the past and in future. Yet, it is the mother that influences the life and future of the child. But both father and mother play essential but different roles in the family. The relationship a child has with his/her parent, would affect the way they choose their friends, lovers, acquaitances around them.

However, no mother will ever harm her own child to spite another person, or even her husband. A child who doesn't have a healthy relationship with her/his mom, may be scarred emotionally in life when she grows up. That is my belief so..(apart from abuse cases, sexual molestation and all that jazz).

I have always complained to my dad why my mother is always so emotionally cold towards me. (or towards anyone else for that matter). Yet, each time, my father defends her, stating that it is the way she is brought up. If it weren't for my father, I don't think I would have had a normal happy teenagehood (not childhood, if u get what I'm trying to say). I always hoped beyond hope that my mother had the best intentions for me when I was growing up, but in spite of this, I still find it hard to believe it from the way she treated me all these years.

I tell myself that I will not treat my children the same way and I vow to have a totally different relationship with them than that I had with my parents.
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2nd day of school.

04/01/2005

2nd day of school.

Tom and Velex seem to getting along real fine.

Wei Heng seems to have settled down.

Zi Yan came down for a while when she saw the play dough. And wanted to go up carrying the rolling pin and play dough in hand. Awww....you miss your teacher so much...he he.

Emily was crying as usual......and puked today! Hmm, I wonder how long more would she be continuing being like that....

Thrown into the limelight, Tom is relishing his role as the big brother. He's showing off...doing stuff for everyone, helping out....but not necesarily means that he is actually being responsible. *lolz*.

Velex on the other hand, doesn't shine out as Tom is. He's still in his own world.
He was trying to talk to me about the rabbits when we were out in the garden. That he was feeding the rabbits and there are two baby rabbits with a big Mama rabbit. *lolz*

Speaking of which, I'm going to have to start teaching the kids sign language, like how I did with the previous group. I find Sign Language immensely useful, and I can sign the entire English alphabet with some basic verb and pronoun signs. Sometimes I sign before I talk, and the kids last year immediately got the hint before I could even say anything. He he. So smart, aren't they?

Ben can actually sign pretty well, but he's forgotten most of it, so he mostly spells it out instead of using the correct signs. As long as he can get the message across!

Have to bring my familiar cd song from last year and play.

Woah......I actually find it comforting to have Velex & Tom in my class. It's like, so reassuring to have some familiar faces within a sea of new faces. :-P
Last year, Tom was like the baby...but now he's like the, woah, I'm gonna be like The Monitor of this class. Everyone follow me, yeah!

*lolz*.
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Time Out

Time Out

I spent 3 hours agonizing over my LifeTrap.
I know my LifeTrap is fighting to survive even at this instance.
Everything that I do, my feelings and my being, is a result of my upbringing, my relationshp with my parents, and also my temperament. I do not put the blame on anyone, however as I know that my parents had the best of intentions when bringing me up.

However, it is hard NOT to find a scapegoat, nor put a finger on your parents, because the facts all point into that direction.
Is this a victim story? No. I don't think so.
What did u expect me to do as a kid? I did not Know Any Better.
Neither Do They.

It doesn't really matter when I realise this for myself. The most important thing is, WHAT DO I DO now that I KNOW?
We are all adults. We can think for ourselves.

If we want to create something for ourselves, we have to start with ourselves.
We have to start taking Responsibility for ourselves.
No one else can do it for us. Not even God. That's Free Will For You.

I would be more accepting and appreciate the people who are emotionally generous with me, right here, right now!

I will stop pining for what I don't have and appreciate the ones that that are they right here with me, like how Dorothy realised that all she wanted was already in her own backyard.
That she didn't have to go over the rainbow to search for what she thought she needed.

I will stop judging the world by my parents' standards. My father can tell me whatever he wants, but it is I who would decide how I should think. I will tell my mother off when she starts comparing how good she is than to me and how she knows things but didn't bother to tell me. What is the point she's trying to make then?

I will stop comparing myself with others, and tell myself that my parents are not there to judge me all the time.
Even if my parents do, they have to accept me unconditionally for who I am, and not who they want me to be. If they think I am a failure, I'll just tell them to get themeselves cloned, so they can have a living, breathing, clone of themselves who'll take over the business.

I'm going to stop thinking that my friends are like my parents. I'm going to tell myself it is OK to not do so well all the time, or if others are better than me. If I Failed, so BE IT.

I'll STOP asking for approval.

I'm going to get a partner SO unlike my father. I'm not even going to think anymore.
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Boring Boring Boring Boring

03/01/2005

Boring Boring Boring Boring

The quick brown fox jumped over the lazy dog.

The quick brown fox jumped over the lazy dog.

The quick brown fox jumped over the lazy dog.

The quick brown fox jumped over the lazy dog.

The quick brown fox jumped over the lazy dog.

You know what? I've got an assignment to do. I've got to hand it in by Friday.

FINALLY, the final, most Final CMS assignment for the year.....Assignment 3.

No more assignment 1 nor Oral Presentation.

YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH.

Move on to more serious things .

YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH.

(I edited this entry. Too silly.)
8 comments
First day of school- 2005

First day of school- 2005

The first day of school is always chaotic. But from what I can see today is, that, I think its the parents who make things chaotic, and not so much lies with the child.

Malaysian parents, in particular, as they are the only breed I have known all this while, only started coming in to enrol their kids this morning. Getting their uniforms, filling in registration forms, going into classrooms.

This all should have been done, not on the first day, but at least one or two weeks before school. How do you expect kids to get acquainted with the classroom if every thing is to be done last minute? And asking for books on the first place?? I think these parents must really be mad,if they weren't already!!!!!

However, fortunately, this morning, there weren't any kids vomitting as yet. School breaks off at 11am for the first two days. It's hard to do any observation even if I wanted to.

There'll be two classes for the 6 yr olds this year, as apposed to one formerly. I'll be handling the 3 & 4 yr old class with Lillian.

In weeks to come, I'll be really busy, running around like a headless chicken up and down. I also have to teach one of the 6 yr old classes English! It's been a year now that I've even stepped into the 6 yr old class to touch the book. I'm sure if I'll relish the thought or not?!!!

My former kids all came in, looking lost, and walking back to my class... It's been a year since I have handled a 3&4 yr old class. Emily was crying when she first came in, and refused to go up. Hmm..I wonder how she'll take it in the 5 yr old class. Wei Heng's mom had to stay with him the entire morning! Ha ha....
Now, Velex and Tom are like the tai kohs in the 4 yr old class, being familiar with the routine and all.

Awwwww.....I'm gonna miss all of them! But at least I still have Velex & Tom with me now!! He he.
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LifeTraps and Schemas.

02/01/2005

LifeTraps and Schemas.

Not too long ago, I borrowed a book from my neighbour,
entitled, Reinventing Your Life-Breakthrough Program to End Negative Behavior, by Young, Jeffrey & Klosko, Janet.
I had briefly skimmed through it, and decided to borrow it, as the details in the book related a lot to the curriculum that AsiaWorks is based on. Something which I was familiar with.

Karen, has through the months of doing LP, finally trained to be persistent enough to do the exercise with me till I get to the core of my problem. I wouldn't call it a problem, but, she had not let it off till I finally said it all out the other night. I really don't know whether to be relieved, or not, as it is still on my mind now as I reflect on it here.

I know that if I call and talk to her now, she'll push at it again for the next 2 hours till I let it out if she HAS to! God, I don't know what those LPs have to undergo..they really push you till you have no space to hide! That however, is a GOOD thing, if you want to CHANGE.

It is a known fact that children are always doing things that would please their parents. I am of no exception.
Initially I had called to wish her happy birthday. However, the conversation took a turn to AW not long after...

Everyone has particular ideals when it comes to looking for a life partner. Mine of which, I didn't really think of till we brought up that issue again. However, we ended up approaching the topic of my ex again..(sigh).

What exactly was it about my ex that I particularly admired? The traits that attracted me to him, was initially because he reminded me a lot of my father. Like it or not, those were the traits I was familiar with, and am comfortable with. Perhaps, in my mind, I was looking for someone like my father.

I was then asked to analyse my current infatuation, which thankfully, I am over with, on the traits in him that I found, was of my father. As I begin to analyse it, I realise that...the infatuation was almost, but not barely baseless. I did not really find any traits in him that I could relate to my father, but we both had similar interests in many things, and almost similar upbringing and taste in friends...

As it is, this comes to the premise that, most of us are much more comfortable with having a partner with traits that we are familliar with, as this is familiar ground. As I read the book, it brought to home the fact that many people, even those who had a disadvantaged childhood with history of different kinds of abuse, would look for a partner who may display the similar traits.As a result, the cycle repeats itself.

The question I would like to ask myself now is, am I looking for a father figure in a partner?
Or is it because I am looking for someone with similar traits to bring home, to show my parents and to please them?
Am I repeating the cycle because this, in itself is the scheme of things that I am familiar with?

What if I broke the cycle, and brought someone who was so disparate and had nothing of the traits of my father?!
Would such a relationship eventually make me happy?

It is a fact, and statistics state couples in successful marriages normally have similar way of thinking, background and experiences.
From my point of view, I feel that it is true to a certain extent.

Apart from the similar traits he had with my father, however in terms social, I could not get along with my ex's friends. I could not tolerate them, as, his friends cursed and swore a lot among themselves, and were, in my experience of them, rather two faced and continually were backstabbing one another.
I could not tolerate them as I had would not tolerate such behaviour among my own social circles. As a result, my ex accused me of not understanding his friends and that I was the reason he could not spend as much time with them... blah blah blah.

However, it seemed that, when he had got together with me, he had totally forgotten the fact that he was the one who made the decision to go with me,
(and the whole other issue of the friend of his who was interested in me somehow managed to rouse up the rest of the gang that it was either them with the former or the latter!) GUYS! So Immature!

As I look at it now, I'd say that, when it comes to looking for a partner, and especially a long term partner, there are many things to look into, and not just the matter of liking that particular person.
In which similar upbringing, social circle, interests, way of thinking.

The premise for the movie, Meeting the Forkers, may or may not be true. I don't really know if relationshps, made of such matter, could be successful in the long run.
It is, when we marry a person, we are also marrying their family.
For me, I would ask myself, if I were to marry such a guy, would I like his father, mother, brother or sister?
Will I get along with them?

Hmm..I am getting TOO Serious here again.
I told myself that I would take it light and easy this year....

*sigh*.
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A new dalliance.

A new dalliance.

This particular entry is the result of a concentrated and group effort of the individuals, in lieu of a particular friend of ours who had undertaken the rendevous with us to Espanda recently.

With much respect and consideration, it was not with prejudice, but care and consideration that we would like to highlight this, which upon reading, I'm sure that the said reader who be able to recognise himself/herself.

The group was priviledged to have met and welcome a certain newcomer, a Miss.Cheng, into its circles.

After much observation and evaluation, the group has concurred to give a unanimous vote of thumbs up to the said new dalliance. ;-)

The new dalliance is said to be much compatible, and the individuals in the group are pleased with it.

However, the individuals in the Group, in reception of the said latter party's no-less-vocal-but-no-less-subtle "territorial-ness", has deemed it fit to add a caveat, in which, if circumstances are left unchecked, may lead to the probability of it snowballing to becoming a wannabe, understated but to a lesser degree of the said Jace&Laynie affair. If forgotten, please re-read details of the affair in the previous blog.

Inductive reasoning, states that a small case sample may render the premise of an argument to be sound, or unsound, in which case, a conclusion here has yet to be reached.

The individuals in the Group wishes to give the current dalliance its blessings & encouragement for success in the weeks to come ;-)
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Resolutions

01/01/2005

Resolutions

*Yup* there was a prayer rally last night...

But instead of concentrating on the prayer, I was making faces with another friend.

Muak muak muak. :-P

*bad girl* *bad bad girl!*

*Scolds self!*

Ai Ling called me not long after....apparently Laynie and family (except for AiLing) were at Jason's church for a countdown service. ah, where to find any countdown events lar? The govt has already cancelled them mah....except for religious events that is.

What are my resolutions this year?

It is *enlightening* talking to Karen, however,.... there are some things.....which I think she probably would never be good at. But then again, I've never seen her in action!

So this year...my usual resolutions would be:

1) Do well in my USQ assignments.

2) Do well in my MCI internship.

3) Do well in both so I can make it in time to go on campus USQ in June!

4) Be a complete flirtatious babe this year!! (like I'm not already, lar??) ;-)

And my first assignment for my Babe Makeover Starts OFFICIALLY Tonight.

See you kids!

Places right hand fingers to lips and gives a flying air kiss,

*muacks!*
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